It went really well. He was very easy to talk to and validated a lot of my feelings which is always nice (I like feeling like I'm not totally crazy, you know?). I'm very excited to continue on this path to make the changes I need to feel myself again.
A good friend of mine brought her kids and came to my house to watch my kids (she would have watched them at her house, but her husband is currently working nights and sleeping days). When I came home the kids were all happy and playing in the backyard. We chatted outside for a bit until Jonas knocker her daughter's loose tooth even more loose and made our way inside. When we entered I was overcome...
~Before she came over I cleaned up a lot of the junk that was lying around the house (like taking down the Christmas decorations), but I didn't get around to doing the dishes (breakfast and pans from last night) or wiping the counters and table. ~
... She had done my dishes and wiped my counters and made my house look so clean! I think she even swept! Wasn't that the nicest thing?!?! I felt so loved. I told her thank you and she just said that when she's pregnant she can't get herself to clean it all so she was only doing what she would hope someone would do for her next time she was pregnant. What a blessing!
Incidentally, my new counselor suggested the idea of hiring someone to help with the house because "no matter what you do, you just can't do everything you want to be able to do." I think that lesson was just driven home more than he could ever hope when I came home to my clean kitchen.
13 comments:
that is so nice! and i'm glad you found a nice counselor. i had one once who made me feel totally bad about myself and un-validated! lame. but i think a good one who can help you sort your thoughts will be a great blessing.
What an awesome friend! Sounds like you found a great counselor, as well. My neighbor hires out her housecleaning when she is pregnant and loves it. Another friend just has someone come once every two weeks and do the floors and bathrooms. Why is everything so much more overwhelming when we are pregnant?
That friend is a keeper...you know you have a true friend when they come over and instead of pointedly not mentioning the mess...they just do something about it. They are few and far between.
Good luck with the counselor that may be a path more of us should follow! I hope it turns out to be the answer to finding your true self amidst the chaos of life as the mother of 4 1/2. Your doing good work...it just takes so long to see the result when the work is raising kids. Hang in there.
i'm glad you are receiving counseling. i was life changing and life saving for me. i hope all sessions leave you feeling this good... and man, the clean house surely helped! i love good friends like that. definite blessing.
Oh man, I may have to save my money for the next time I am pregnant so I can hire a housecleaner (though my house pails in comparison to yours size-wise.) Still. I want one.
I'm glad you felt validated. When you are hurting inside that is so liberating to have someone understand your pain. Keep it up and good luck. Love!
Hi Kim, I haven't checked in with your family in a while. Congrats on baby #5, I guess I have some catching up to do. I'm feeling for you, sweet lady! I experienced depression while pregnant with Asher. It was awful! May I add my vote to getting help with the housework!!! It makes a big difference, among other things! For me medication was key too. Those hormones messed me up good. Good luck to you and take good care of yourself (which means your taking good care of that growing baby inside you too!).
Oh, I am so sorry you have been so depressed. I am not much help for you at all. I am SO ON BOARD with getting housekeeping help. Just a LITTLE help goes a LONG way to feeling better!!!
You are a smart girl to know what you needed to do and reach out for counseling. You are totally in an overwhelming position with four small children and another one on the way. You have my prayers with you. Love, Jane the mother in love
Kim... I think you are AMAZING!!! I love reading your blog and I love hearing about what's really happening in your life.. I hope you start feeling better soon.. I thought it was interesting when you talked about how nice it is to have someone validate your feelings, the first thing I thought of is the many times you've been that person to me :) Thanks for being an amazing sister!! Love you!!
Sorry to hear it has been terrible. Thank heavens for wonderful people though. I've been struggling a little more this winter myself. I've decided to try getting more sun and see if that helps. Running used to be a big mood lifter, but since I can't do that right now...
You are definitely blessed. Thank heavens for good friends. Janet was my blessing when I shattered my knee and was feeling so guilty for putting so much preasure on your dad. She was a life saver.
Boy I am looking so forward to March. I can't wait to give all of you a big hug and kiss. Remember to keep smiling.
Love you tons. Mom
Well, Kim, I've been in that place, too. Obviously, our experiences are different, but I feel like I can sympathize. Please call me if you ever want to chat, or anything. Sometimes all I want is to hear about someone else's life so I can stop thinking about mine for a while!
Oh Kim! First of all, I'm so glad that you have such a wonderful friend--that sounds like such a treat! And, I'm so glad that your counselor is a good one as well. A good counselor can be a lifesaver.
Reading this almost made me cry...I've felt this way so many different times. It can be so overwhelming to be a mom. Not to mention all of the responsibility that comes with being pregnant, and all of the hormonal changes that take place to create and grow that baby.
You are a wonderful mother. And wise, as well, to recognize your feelings and do what's best to help you right now. Your kids are so lucky to be with you. I hope that you feel better soon...I know it sounds lame, but I really do hope that the depression doesn't stick around for much longer. It's so tiring and frustrating to feel like that. You're in my prayers, my friend.
Okay, so I started to type a big long response but figure it would be easier to just call you. So I think I will do that. Talk to you soon!
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